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THE GUNSLINGER

PostPosted: 27 Jan 2014, 20:32
by Stratpicker
A young cowboy sitting in a saloon one Saturday night recognized an elderly man standing at the bar who, in his day, had been the fastest gun in the West.
The cowboy took a place next to the old-timer, bought him a drink and told him of his great ambition to be a great shot...
'Could you give me some tips?' he asked.
The old man said, 'Well, for one thing, you're wearing your gun too high - tie the holster a little lowerdown on your leg.'
'Will that make me a better gunfighter?'
'Sure will '
The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped out his .44 and shot the bow tie off the piano player.
'That's terrific!' said the cowboy. 'Got any more tips?'
'Yep,' said the old man. 'Cut a notch out of your holster where the hammer hits it - that'll give you a smoother draw'
'Will that make me a better gunfighter?' asked the young man.
'You bet it will,' said the old-timer.
The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his gun in a blur, and then shot a cufflink off the piano player.
'Wow!' exclaimed the cowboy 'I'm learnin' somethin' here. Got any more tips?'
The old man pointed to a large can in a corner of the saloon. 'See that axle grease over there? Coat your gun with it.'
The young man smeared some of the grease on the barrel of his gun.
'No,' said the old-timer, 'I mean smear it all over the gun, handle and all.'
'Will that make me a better gunfighter?' asked the young man.
'No,' said the old-timer, 'but when Wyatt Earp gets done playing the piano, he's gonna shove that gun right up your a**e, and it won't hurt as much.

I wonder if the the vigilante Personal Censors working purely and selflessly on behalf of anyone who might or might not think this funny will get it pulled? It made me laugh anyway :D

Re: THE GUNSLINGER

PostPosted: 27 Jan 2014, 21:13
by johnh
:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Re: THE GUNSLINGER

PostPosted: 27 Jan 2014, 21:27
by bridev
Made me smile too. :D :D

bri

Re: THE GUNSLINGER

PostPosted: 27 Jan 2014, 21:33
by noelford
Stratpicker wrote:
I wonder if the the vigilante Personal Censors working purely and selflessly on behalf of anyone who might or might not think this funny will get it pulled? It made me laugh anyway :D


You'll have to try harder, Ian, it's far too funny!

Re: THE GUNSLINGER

PostPosted: 27 Jan 2014, 21:55
by jimuc
Nice one Ian :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:

Re: THE GUNSLINGER

PostPosted: 28 Jan 2014, 08:10
by dave robinson
Love it! :lol:

Re: THE GUNSLINGER

PostPosted: 08 May 2014, 12:28
by Strummer
Just read it, brilliant made me simile BIG!

Re: THE GUNSLINGER

PostPosted: 09 May 2014, 21:53
by John Boyd
Ian, I got a good laugh out of it too. :lol: :lol: :lol:
Thanks for posting it.
JB